9.21.2012

Clasping Gold Instead of Gold Stars

It is a difficult and forever-long process, this learning how to make everything sacred

It is also beautifully rewarding.

Learning how to make all things in your life sacred takes focus. It takes the sort of focus that teaches me how to be single-hearted towards God.


She is good at being very focused and single-minded, my youngest. Especially when she needs something.

The dreaded event of all mothers everywhere, her special lovey simply had to be washed at bedtime one night. My littlest couldn't understand why she didn't have her bunny at bedtime.


"Bunny?" "Bunny is taking a bath, darling. I will bring you Bunny as soon as she is dry." "O-hay."

"Can I read you a bedtime story?" "Bunny?" "Bunny is taking a bath." "Bass? Bunny?" "Yes, a bath. I'll bring you Bunny when she is done." "O-hay."

"Let's talk about our day, shall we?" "Mommy? Bunny?"

 I sigh in frustration, yet feel a small stir in my heart. 

What if I were that focused in my pursuit of God, my pursuit of making all things in my life meaningful?

What if I, too, blocked out more of the mindless stories I read and meaningless discussions I have online in order to pursue God? What would that even look like?
You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. ~ Isaiah 26.3

I read about a mother and daughter on a trip together through the world. The mother speaks of a friend who accomplishes a marvelous amount of things during a day. 
What's allowed her to realize her dream where so many others fail, including me for many years, is how carefully and sanely she chooses exactly where to spend her time and energy...Kristin's life illustrates that it takes more than passion and a lot of work to make a dream work--it takes focus. What you think about matters, a lot. Your thoughts drive your actions.
The mother continues to talk about the myriad of women who choose to please others, to accommodate others, rather than choosing to stand up for themselves and their families.

She says that many of us choose to be "good girls going for gold stars, instead of clasping tight the gold of our lives by living as we truly desire."

This has the scent of truth that makes me pause. If I substitute "living as God desires", this touches something deep in my heart. 

How many times have I said "yes" to an activity, to a time commitment, even to a service opportunity, simply to please someone else or to create a certain image of myself? 

So many times those "yeses" have cost me and my family. They have kept me from clasping tight the gold of obeying God's desire that I should, for this season, focus most on these little disciples running around my feet.


I want desperately to be single-hearted. I desire to chase after God, to pursue and focus on only what He has called me to do rather than to fritter away my moments on activities that attempt to please others.

What does this look like? How do you do this in your own life? How do you carefully and sanely choose exactly where to spend your time and energy? 

Do you have a goal, a purpose or mission statement for your family? Do you have a lens through which you filter every request, every moment's choice? 

The mother in my book says that "change happens in the small moments, when a sliver of light finds its way through the cracks". 

To help herself to focus, she "wrote down every single thing I did in fifteen-minute increments for three entire weeks...I asked myself a thousand times a day before acting - and, miraculously, speaking - What am I creating with this choice right now?"

I want to see everything around me as sacred, to be single-minded in pursuing God and His desires for me. I want to choose with intention rather than feelings, excuses, or circumstances. I want to please God rather than man.

I want to clasp tight the gold instead of aimlessly grasping for gold stars.

5 comments:

  1. I've been thinking about a mission statement for our family. Maybe not a formal one, but one where we could look at a situation and say, "Would that be best for our family?" Then, we could look at our mission statement, remind us of our purpose, and decide accordingly.

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    1. I've been reading the book Organized Simplicity, which is what got me started thinking about family mission statements. We're not to the point yet of having every kid in an activity, but it would sure be nice to have a stated purpose of some kind to use as a standard-bearer as the kids get older!

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  2. Great post Elizabeth. Very well put. We have a family purpose statement and wrote it out after I read Organized Simplicity. It really makes a difference and we come back to it at different times to see how we are doing or reference it when making decisions to do things as a family - yes, that fits our statement or no, that's not what we want to be about. It's very helpful. You can see ours here: http://www.funkiplanet.com/2011/03/living-simple-life-in-2011.html

    Thanks for your thoughts in this post. Well done.

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  3. A beautifully written post, thank you for your insights. The thought about "what if I pursued God this single-mindly" really resonated with me. It's so easy to get distracted; thank you for encouraging me to focus on the "gold."

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    1. I wish so much that I could be more single-hearted! I'm so grateful that God keeps gently turning my head back in His direction.

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