What should we do now? How should we respond? When life seems to be running rapidly into a dead end
When we feel carved out and emptied by the rivers of this world's realities
When the weight of our pain threatens to crush
When our hearts are pitted and scarred by pain, anguish, shame
What should we do? Yes, we continue to obey, to follow the signs. To what purpose? To what end? The men who walked in the fire told a king that even if God refused to rescue, they would continue to obey. The man who lost all but his life declared that even if God took the last thing remaining to him, he would continue to trust. Why do we obey, why do we trust even when we cannot seem to find the light? Listen. Listen to the Word speak. Listen to what the Word says as He is drawing very near to His own darkness. "Now my heart is troubled, and what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour. Father, glorify your name!" The Glory of God our Father. Out of the rocks, His glory bursts forth.
Out of the dead and the dying, His beauty shines out.
All praise to God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Father, glorify Your name!
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It is hard to have patience with people who say, "There is no death" or "Death doesn't matter." There is death. And whatever is matters...I look up at the night sky. Is anything more certain than that in all those vast times and spaces, if I were allowed to search them, I should nowhere find her face, her voice, her touch? She died. She is dead. Is the word so difficult to learn?
Maybe because that is what we were taught in our churches. Maybe because of pieces of Scripture that we read such as "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." ~ Philippians 1.21
We long to be with God, long to see Him face-to-face, long for the day when there will be no more hurting, suffering or tears...
And we long for the day when there will be no more death.
Isn't death what gets us to that glorious day?
Yes, but that isn't how it was supposed to be.
We weren't supposed to have to die to get to God, we were supposed to simply live with God.
And the LORD God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever." ~ Genesis 3.22
We brought death into this world through our sin and death is our enemy.
Our enemy!
My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death assail me. ~ Psalm 55.4
Our God is a God who saves; from the Sovereign LORD comes escape from death. ~ Psalm 68.20
For you, LORD, have delivered my soul from death... ~ Psalm 116.8
On this mountain he (the Lord) will destroy the shroud that enfolds all peoples, the sheet that covers all nations; he will swallow up death forever. ~ Isaiah 25.7-8
I will ransom them from the power of the grave; I will redeem them from death. Where, O death, are your plagues? Where, O death, is your destruction? ~ Hosea 13.14
We have opened the door and allowed death to enter our world.
Jesus came and defeated our enemy. Did you hear? Death is defeated!!!!!
...through the appearing of our Savior, Jesus Christ, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel. ~ II Timothy 1.10
For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. ~ Romans 6.9
Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. ~ Revelation 21.4
This is how it is supposed to be.
So go ahead. You have permission.
Hate death. Give praise and thanks and glory to God.
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I've learned the hard way that if my eldest girl is expecting to stay at the park and I suddenly pronounce now to be the time to go home, meltdowns and tantrums ensue.
If, however, I give her warning and help her to rehearse what is coming, peace and joy are retained. Mostly.
Expectations.
Just as they color the relationship between my eldest and me, they determine the state of my relationship with God.
As I wrestle with this cancer that is threatening to overtake my sister, my brother's wife, this 26-year-old mommy of a 15-month old, I am forced to look hard at what I expect from God.
I expect to grow old with my love. I expect to watch my children grow up. I expect to meet my grandchildren, my great-grandchildren. I expect that my parents will dance at their grandchildren's weddings. I expect good health and more than enough to live.
This is what I dare to say I think I deserve.
When I, or those I love, don't get what I expect, I am left with anger and resentment.
I am reading One Thousand Gifts: "Expectations kill relationships - especially with God...Is it only when our lives are emptied that we're surprised by how truly full our lives were? Instead of filling with expectations, the joy-filled expect nothing - and are filled. This breath! This oak tree! This daisy! This work! This sky! These people! This place! This day! Surprise!...Are there times that a sense of entitlement - expectations - is what inflates self, detonates anger, offends God, extinguishes joy? And what do I really deserve? Thankfully, God never gives what is deserved, but instead, God graciously, passionately offers gifts, our bodies, our time, our very lives. "
The idea leaves me whirling. Can I truly live like that? Can I be grateful for every moment that I have with my family, knowing that each moment is a gift, something that I don't deserve? Can I live grateful for every small gift that God gives?
Can I live without expecting God to give the gifts I think He should give?
I ponder this thought throughout my next days.
Then I see it. I see it in a passage that I have read so many times that I now tend to skim.
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. ~Rom. 5.3-6
Yes, I know. Suffering produces hope.
Wait.
A niggling in the back of my brain stirs up the idea of a meaning behind hope. I go to my Strong's.
The word translated "hope" is from elpis (elpizo or elpo): to expect, to anticipate (usually with pleasure), expectation or confidence.
Suffering produces confidence, expectation, because of God pouring out His love, because of Christ dying for a sinner. For me.
My heart longs for more and so I search.
How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure. ~I John 3.1-3
This hope. The same word. Elpis. Expectation.
Expectation of lavish love, of being made children of God. Expectation of knowing, seeing and being made like God. Expectation.
This. This is what I should expect from God.
I weep, ashamed that I demand such small things from God, ashamed that I expect such fleeting gifts when He is promising such riches, such beauty.
